Chronic fatigue
I thought I was suffering from chronic fatigue syndrome, but not even close, little girl.
After watching "Unrest," a Sundance award-winning documentary by Jennifer Brea chronicling her life with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME), also known as chronic fatigue syndrome, I know I do not have this disease. I am not bedridden nor do I have debilitating fatigue, widespread pain, sleep disturbances, memory and concentration issues, difficulty walking, and other symptoms like sound and light sensitivities or muscle spasms.
Well, I do have sleep disturbances and memory/concentration issues, but for me these can be the aftermath, long-term, possibly permanent side effects of chemotherapy. Or maybe it's just part of the aging process. I don't know. All I know is I am fatigued pretty much all of the time.
The scene in "Unrest" where Jennifer Brea's husband films her crawling up the stairs because she is unable to walk up the stairs is how I feel inside. I may be walking, talking, working, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, but too often way down deep inside, I am crawling. Whatever and wherever this well (spiritual? emotional? mental?) is, it's running on almost empty.
Right now, I can barely compose a coherent thought to write down. I have a doctor's appointment on Wednesday; I had my blood drawn earlier this week so maybe she can point to a cause for this fatigue, like no blood. Maybe a vampire visits me in the deep night while I'm asleep and sups on my red, life-giving blood.
I probably need a vacation, to get away from the job and all my responsibilities. But, honestly, just the thought of all the prep that would go into me taking an away-vacation is too tiring to even think about. Right now, I need a nap, and it's only 11:15 in the morning.
After watching "Unrest," a Sundance award-winning documentary by Jennifer Brea chronicling her life with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME), also known as chronic fatigue syndrome, I know I do not have this disease. I am not bedridden nor do I have debilitating fatigue, widespread pain, sleep disturbances, memory and concentration issues, difficulty walking, and other symptoms like sound and light sensitivities or muscle spasms.
Well, I do have sleep disturbances and memory/concentration issues, but for me these can be the aftermath, long-term, possibly permanent side effects of chemotherapy. Or maybe it's just part of the aging process. I don't know. All I know is I am fatigued pretty much all of the time.
The scene in "Unrest" where Jennifer Brea's husband films her crawling up the stairs because she is unable to walk up the stairs is how I feel inside. I may be walking, talking, working, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, but too often way down deep inside, I am crawling. Whatever and wherever this well (spiritual? emotional? mental?) is, it's running on almost empty.
Right now, I can barely compose a coherent thought to write down. I have a doctor's appointment on Wednesday; I had my blood drawn earlier this week so maybe she can point to a cause for this fatigue, like no blood. Maybe a vampire visits me in the deep night while I'm asleep and sups on my red, life-giving blood.
I probably need a vacation, to get away from the job and all my responsibilities. But, honestly, just the thought of all the prep that would go into me taking an away-vacation is too tiring to even think about. Right now, I need a nap, and it's only 11:15 in the morning.
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